(no subject)
Ugh work just call me already. I have am going into week three of doing nothing really. A week was quite nice, at this point I am freaking bored and poor. Luckily my parents are letting me stay at home for free. I have known I have this job since like March. Now that I filled out the paperwork for my background check and done my piss test I am just waiting for it to come back. I know I am clean, just let me work already.

No longer Catholic
I have been to church around 3 times in the last 4 or 5 years I think? The most recent time was on this past Sunday. I went because my dad asked me to be there to celebrate my grandparents 60th wedding anniversary. I actually listened to what the priest was saying this time, and the things that changed since I was little. (I am sure some of these things had changed already when I went to church the last two times, but they were funerals and I was more trying not to cry than pay attention to what was being said.) This time two things stood out to me about Mass.
1. The way I remember it: "...which shall be given up for you and for all."
The way it was on Sunday: "...which shall be given up for you and for many." The priest actually started to say all here and caught himself, so I think that maybe this is a newer changes.
2. The way I remember it: "...he suffered, died, and was buried."
The way it was on Sunday: "...he suffered death and was buried."

The first one made me sad that the church is so exclusionary. The second one made me mad because death is not something to be suffered. Especially in this context, death is not something bad. Here Jesus was suffering and in lots of pain and then when he died he got to go be with his father again. In my experience (with losing relatives) death is always a freeing of pain, not something to be suffered.

I guess this is one of the many reasons I am no longer Catholic, or any religion, and have not been for a very long time.

Death just doesn't go away
I lost one of my favorite "aunt"s today. She was my mom's aunt, so really was a great aunt. She married my mom's uncle when he was in Korea (I think), she was from Japan. She was 86, and ready to go for years. When my grandma stopped dialysis she was jealous, and that was a year and a half ago. We think she had cancer, but she didn't want to know. She just wanted to live until she stopped.  That was this morning at 5:00 am. I will miss her so much. I just have to write down some of my many happy memories.
Every christmas she would bring the best egg rolls ever for us. My dad and I basically ate them all and we were the only reason that she brought them. When my mom asked her how to make them, my mom got yelled at. Her response was "You know how to make them! I have told you before." The secret is there should pretty much only be cabbage and ground meat (pork) in the roll, and you only add the soy sauce as a dip. So yummy!
She came to my graduation party even when she wasn't feeling well even them.
If she couldn't come to christmas, she sent egg rolls with her son for me and my dad.
Even though she had no money, she would always give me $20 for my birthday/christmas.
She always had a dog named Tinker. I believe she is on Tinker the 5th or 6th right now. Her daughter in law still does not know that the dogs are always named Tinker and so thinks the dog's name is Tinka. My mom's favorite was "Tinka turd" (Tinker 3rd.)
I had a special nickname that only she (and her late husband) called me. She couldn't pronounce my real name, and so gave me a new one.
She loved her granddaughter, even though her granddaughter ran her ragged.
My roommate is from Norway, and going back mid December. My mom let my aunt know this. My aunt's reaction? To say that I needed to go visit over the summer.  When my mom said I couldn't afford to go (and I can't) my aunt just said, "You need to pay for the trip, that is what mothers are for." 
I love you forever, and I know that this is EXACTLY what you wanted.

PS, if anyone says anything about how horrible it was that she didn't go to get treated for her cancer, I WILL delete the comment. That is not ok right now, and this will probably be the only time I delete something that is not spam from my page.
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(no subject)
I am so excited right now!!!!!!!!!!!
Bachmann is tied with Graves, Heitkamp is ahead of Berg. This is just blowing my mind. 
And oh ya, President Obama is now president for another four years!!!!!

Holy fuck I am so excited.

Morning/Evening Conversations
Mom: I want pizza
Me:me too. We have one in the freezer so let's do it. 
Mom: isn't it weird that I want pizza so early in the day?
Me: no. It is now my supper and you are stealing a few pieces. Feel better?
Mom: yes, much. 

Oh the conversations we have. 

Some context: It was  8:30 AM. I work nights, so my evening is her morning.

What a lovely last night
Well that sucked.
Cut for those with a weak stomach and talk of not so nice bodily functions.Collapse )
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Help Us Support Planned Parenthood
Originally posted by lickety_split at Help Us Support Planned Parenthood
Originally posted by theljstaff at Help Us Support Planned Parenthood

Join us in standing up for reproductive health and education. Planned Parenthood, the organization that delivers reproductive health care, sex education and information to millions of people worldwide, has come under fire in the U.S. lately, with many politicians on both state and federal level seeking to end funding (and in a few cases succeeding).

During the month of May, you can send a specially designed Planned Parenthood vgift to your friends to help support this cause. (And if you need someone to send it to, frank is always happy to receive gifts!) There are three variations ($1, $5 and $10) for you to choose from, but they'd all look good on your profile when your friends know that you stand by something so important.


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I would donate, but as a poor college student I just can't afford it right now. So I figured I would at the very least spread the word.

Phones are evil
I really wish that I didn't feel panic when I think about calling people on the phone. I ordered pizza over an hour ago, which took me about two hours to convince myself to do, and it still hasn't shown up. I think either gave the wrong phone number when I called, or the person taking my order took down the number wrong. When I think about having to call again tonight I start to get tears in my eyes, and it feels like someone is squeezing my chest. They have to call in order for me to get my pizza because I live in a res hall that is locked 24/7. No pizza for me. Now I have to find something in my room for supper since I cleaned out my fridge for spring break and have not had a chance to resupply, and all the dining centers are closed. I really wish I did phones better.

Writer's Block: Meow vs. Arf
Cats or dogs-- which do you prefer, and why?

Cats because they are cuddly when you need it, but are independent enough that they can take care of themselves when you are busy.

Dear Cancer,
Fuck off and die.
No love,

In the past 6 months my dad and two of my uncles have been diagnosed with cancer. What the hell is up with that? And if I think about it any more I will start crying, so no more thinking about it while at work. :(
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